Eastern Conference
Bruins/Habs
Who's winning this: Bruins take it in 5
The Habs can win if: They put poison in the Bruins' water bottles
It would be nice if...: The Bruins dropped off the face of the earth
Things we expect to see:
- Bloodbath
- Price will play better than Thomas and still let in more goals
- Lucic will hurt someone
- Media will be stupid
- Thomas giving up softy from the neutral zone. Happened before. Can happen again!
- Bruins blowing up like the Habs did last year versus them
- D actually backs up Pricey
Who's winning: Caps in 6
Rags can win if: If they stuff Ovie, Semin and Backstrom in a trunk
It would be nice if: Someone smacked Avery upside the head
Things we expect to see:
- Avery annoying Theodore
- Rags trying to beat up Ovie
- Semin NOT trying to "fight" Staal bro. no. 2
- Caps not forgetting that if a Rag hits their own player who then knocks their goalie out of the net and the Rags score, it will count as a goal.
- Tortorella going insane
- Avery going out with another spleen injury
- Avery being beat up by Semin
- Avery being beat up by Ovie
- Ovie getting a hattrick versus the Rags
Who's winning: Someone in 5,6, or 7..... Haven't figured out who will win this yet...
Someone can win if: They can stay awake. You stay awake you win. Simple.
It would be nice if: this matchup actually turned into something interesting....
Things we expect to see:
- Snooze fest
- Brodeur doing something
- Staal bro. no. 1 doing something
- Brodeur being booed
- Brodeur breathing
- Brodeur not saving the puck
- These two teams actually made the game interesting by getting a little grumpy with each other
- Brodeur being pulled
Who's winning: Pens in 6
Flyers can win if: Scott Hartnell's hair scares the Penguins out of their minds
It would be nice if: Crosby got the flu and sat out the entire series...
Things we expect to see:
- A bloodbath
- Fleury will outplay Biron like he always does because he's Fleury and Biron is a sieve
- EP trying to balance her love for Fleury with her hate for the Penguins
- Staal brother no. 3 will be forgotten in all the Malkin and Crosby hate
- Biron displaying some of that very annoying talent against the Habs..... did I just say that?!
- Richards gets a shorthanded goal in a game that the Flyers actually win
- Me forgetting that I actually want to see a Flyers victory
Sharks/Ducks
Who's winning: Sharks in 5
Ducks can win if: they get a better name. I mean, DUCKS?
It would be nice if: The Sharks didn't have to wear teal.....
Things we expect to see:
- Thornton making silly comments about how big and strong the Sharks are
- Me hating the Sharks
- Everyone declaring the Sharks the major favorites in the entire league
- Ducks stick it to the Sharks and go to a game 6 or 7
- Me not caring about this series as supposed to angsting over whether Thornton will get kicked around
Who's winning: Wings in 6
Jackets can win if: Mason drinks a lot of Red Bull and Osgood continues as usual...
It would be nice if: Osgood and/or Conklin didn't look silly compared to Mason
We expect to see:
- goaltending being a major factor in this series
- a potential meltdown for the Jackets in their first ever playoff series
- Datsyuk getting at least three sick goals
- Wings not being upset
- Osgood actually doesn't give up 10 goals in a period
- The Wings don't underestimate the Jackets as supposed to going into it with the "been there done this *yawns* like you're going to beat us?" attitude
- Jackets implode
Who's winning: Canucks in 5
Blues can win if: They send Luongo to Australia
It would be nice if: The Blues extended the Canucks to 7 and even took the series
We expect to see:
- Those creepy twins being a factor for the Canucks
- Luongo being good
- TSN loving Vancover and wishing that they were the only team that existed in Canada besides the Leafs
- Blues making a go of it
- Me forgetting who every Blues player is..
- Me remembering some Blues players
- Those creepy twins implode
- Sundin does nothing at all
Blackhawks/Flames
Who's winning: Flames in 7
Hawks can win if: They don't get run over by Dion Phaneuf first Edit: apparently he's injured so... uh... yeah... oh well... the Flames will have to come up with another way of burning the Hawks
It would be nice if: This wasn't the "battle of the godawful goalhorns".....
We expect to see:
- sort of experience pull through
- the Hawks celebrating being in the playoffs
- Toews and Kane looking a little lost at times
- someone actually caring about this series
- there are actually enough players to play
- Everyone staying hush about the Hawks making the playoffs
IN CONCLUSION:
The playoffs sound boring right now. Someone please go out and prove me wrong and do some upsetting while playing some entertaining hockey.
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